| Summer '06 |
[12 Aug 2006|09:20am] |
this summer has gone by way too fast,
i need to stop time and fix all the things i did wrong,
i've missed out on so much because of my own stupidity, or selfishness
don't get me wrong, i've had a wonderful summer but it could've been a lot better
And now my summer is almost gone
I start school in a few weeks,
Im so stressed, and worried
it's a new school by the way.
Im excited and nervous at the same time,
i want to do really good this year,
im even thinking about starting a sport or something
I don't know..
i'll update you the first day of school to let you know how it goes.
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[19 May 2006|11:44am] |
"We must not be surprised if we are in for a rough time," he writes. "When a man turns to Christ and seems to be getting on pretty well in the sense that some of his bad habits are now corrected, he often feels that it would now be natural if things went fairly smoothly. When troubles come along - illnesses, money troubles, new kinds of temptation - he is disappointed. These things, he feels, might have been necessary to rouse him and make him repent in his bad old days; but why now?" And now notice this: "Because God is forcing him on, or up, to a higher level: putting him into situations where he will have to be very much braver, or more patient, or more loving, than he ever dreamed of being before. It seems to us all unnecessary: but that is because we have not yet had the slightest notion of the tremendous thing He means to make of us."
- C.S. Lewis
I think God is testing me,
And trying to make me stronger,
I am not completely sure
But I’ve been going through some tough things this year.
These things seem to make me think;
think about my relationship with God,
And think about decisions I’ve been making.
It’s been tough, real tough.
But maybe something big is going to happen in my life.
There's got to be a reason for all of this.
I just got to be patient.
So whoever has been going through a hard time;
Don't give up
It’s happening for a reason,
To make you stronger,
And don't go weak, and take the easy way out,
Take the hard way, and gain something from it.
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[04 May 2006|03:46pm] |
La vida es maravillosa
life is wonderful
i've realized that,
yeah life sometimes hurts like hell
but it always ends up wonderful.
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[19 Apr 2006|05:30pm] |
Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.
Letters to a Young Poet
i really need to learn how to live like that;
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[06 Apr 2006|07:30pm] |
Its the simple things in life that i adore.
Just laying on my bed listening to copeland is amazing,
i feel like I'm on top of the world.
.& this certain boy is coming back to California
:this is the definition of a very happy girl.
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[29 Mar 2006|10:28am] |
F a i t h.
that's what i need the most right now.
I need faith in
friends.
school.
future.
myself.
I'm always afraid to lose people close to me;
i never get to see my best friend.
like once a week now.
and im scared.
I'm scared we'll grow apart,
or she'll decide its not worth it anymore.
or maybe that she doesn't need me anymore.
it scares me to death.
i dont want to lose her,
but if i did.
I'd understand.
i haven't been the person a best friend should be.
i've been terrible.
and i need to fix that.
she needs to know how much i love her,
and that she's gotten me through impossible things,
without her, i wouldn't be me.
i hope she comprehends all of that.
just know.
best friend- i always need you,
and im always here for you.
don't ever lose sight of what you mean to me darlin'
proverbs 17:17
♥
School is just blah.
i dont even know.
im trying to make decisions that are hard,
and im in a hole.
i dont know what to do.
i'm afraid of change.
don't even get me started on my future.
it scares me to death.
i dont want to grow up.
i wont do it.
myself.wow.
i need faith in myself the most;
that would solve all my problems.
God give me faith,
in you
in me
in life
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[22 Mar 2006|04:18pm] |
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Life is beautiful.
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[13 Mar 2006|08:09pm] |
| [ |
music |
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I wanna dance with somebody |
] |
“All our young lives we search for someone to love. Someone who makes us complete. We choose partners and change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope... all the while wondering if somewhere, somehow, there's someone perfect... who might be searching for us.”
- The Wonder Years
I can really not wait until i find someone perfect
yeah i've had some heartbreaks,
and let downs.
but who hasn't?
i believe that those heartaches,and breaks
happen for a reason
so maybe when our perfect someone comes
we will really appreciate them,
and the fact that they will never break our hearts.
i want to fall in love.
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[27 Jan 2006|06:51pm] |
to me this picture is extraordinary and beautiful.
It tells me that God will never let me fall,
he holds me up.
It tells me that im forgiven.
..even when we think I gonna hit rock bottom,
He will catch me.
to me this is undiscribable, because the beauty of it is astonishing and flawless.
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[05 Jan 2006|03:05pm] |
People change. Things change.
it sucks but its part of life
and im realizing that,
and im slowly getting used to it.
In the years of my life i have gained
and lost a lot of friends.
People walk in and out of my life all the time
and im starting to get sick of it
like i know there are a few people in my life
that will always be there for me
and be there with me
but im scared.
im so scared that im going to lose more friends
there's some "drama" going on right now
i dont want to go through this again
this whole drama thing, then losing someone,
then doing it all over again.
I can't do anything to change what happens
but right now i dont feel like i have anyone
like its a weird feeling.
don't get offended, its just a feeling,
a feeling that im unsure of and hate.
i feel like i dont have control of my life
i feel like im gonna lose everyone
and i look at all my friends
and i dont want to lose any of them
and i've been thinking alot
like maybe this person is done with me
and whats wrong with me.
why dont people stay forever.
but i do have such amazing friends,
and i have the most faith in the world
that some of them will stay.
maybe this is a test.
..thank you to every who has been there for me,
some of you will never leave
i know it.
it just hurts.
and the feeling of having no control drives me insane.
i want a boyfriend
kind of
but i dont think im stable enough right now.
maybe later.
ha
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[18 Dec 2005|07:16pm] |
"To me, there are three things we all should do every day. We should do this every day of our lives. Number one is laugh. You should laugh every day. Number two is think. You should spend some time in thought. And number three is, you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that's a full day. That's a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you're going to have something special."
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[08 Dec 2005|07:05pm] |
aaannnd i saw farria and shad,
we ate subway
& talked.
I got shoes.
and kelly anne's spending the night tonight.
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[08 Dec 2005|02:45pm] |
I'm at bri's
I saw Meg
Life is good.
:)
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[20 Nov 2005|05:23pm] |
i need some fun in my life.
im lammmmeee
and i want a boy.
i want to feel needed
and truely, deeply loved
and confident
i hate wanting someone.
like i love the feeling,
but all i do
is prepare myself for a heartbreak?
i need to feel complete 100% content with God.
and i hate that i cant.
again.
Im laammmeeee
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[11 Nov 2005|07:45pm] |
some days are just good.
today was one of those "good" days
first i got my computer back.
it broke so i didn't have it for 5 days.
second i went to the mall with sierra,alycia,kelly anne, and then saw bre,racheal,christine,kandice, and liza.
:]
then i went to sierra's house and played with her dinosaurs
and looked at her frogs
then ate
and watched degrassi.
intense.
now im waiting til nine so i can watch "the wizard of oz"
all time favorite movie.
my day was good.
but i still miss my best friend,brianne christine parry.
which makes me sad.
and it sucks.
i haven't seen her in over a week.
i miss her with all of my heart.
te amo.
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[05 Nov 2005|03:18pm] |
life sucks alot sometimes..
but oh well
Jesus loves me
and so does Brianne christine parry
therefore.
life is complete.
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[31 Oct 2005|03:48pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 tired |
] |
| [ |
music |
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The spill canvas |
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( mall rats )
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| : > |
[24 Oct 2005|03:40pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 my head hurts.bad. |
] |
| [ |
music |
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The Rocket Summer.-That's So You. |
] |
The spill canvas/copeland/daphne loves derby show was amazing.
copeland probably made my life. and they sang my song, pin your wings, first.
after the show kelly anne and sierra came to my house and spent the night,
sierra was dead by 2 in the morning,we made her sleep on the ground.
but me and kelly anne talked til 4 30 in the morning.
amazing conversation. it made my night.
that whole night was amazing.
i really needed it. some things were getting to me,
and that night seemed to sweep my troubles away.
its the simple things in life that seem to keep me lifted.
so thank you to everyone who took part in making my night wonderful.
but mostly thank you
copeland.
bri.
kelly anne.
megan.
P.S.
Bri keep your head up//
Im always here.
I'll take care of you, oh
Have faith that when you call my name
I'll be there
I'll be right there
So keep breathing on
Keep that sweet heart of yours beating
And I'll be there
I'll be right there
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